Where did everyone go?

it will make sense

I had a thought recently: where did everyone go?

I laughed because, living in a big city, I’m constantly surrounded by people. Spending so much time around way too many people, how could I still be longing for, craving, wanting for human connection? A small talk about the weather, a chat about grocery prices at the store, a quick vent session about life at the train station? It used to be.

The answer came to me just as quickly: Everyone is here, online; talking about the weather, complaining about grocery prices, and venting about life on the world wide web.

I’m just not here. And it sucks.

Everyone is talking, but the silence is deafening.

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The loneliest place

The loneliest place has billions of people on it.

The loneliest place promises to connect us with these billions of people worldwide, at any given time of the day.

The loneliest place is where we spend the majority of our time.

The loneliest place is full of noise, chats, arguments.

The loneliest place is supposed to make us feel less lonely.

Not long ago, I used to spend a lot of my time at the loneliest place; engrossed, addicted, alone.

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Should you delete social media? That’s the wrong question.

Is this better than scrolling through Instagram?

When I was 21, I asked the wrong question: Should I delete social media?

I had plenty of reasons; rescue my attention, stop social comparison, connect with people more deeply, blah, blah, blah. You know, the usual.

And so, after some contemplation, learning about the attention economy, and getting angry enough at social media, I deleted Twitter in 2017, and spent three years blissfully disconnected from it all.

Then, I got hooked on reddit.

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The opposite of addiction is connection

The opposite of addiction is not sobriety, the opposite of addiction is connection.

— JOHANN HARI

In the podcast episode The Opposite of Addiction by Your Undivided Attention, Johann Hari makes the case that addiction, amongst other mental health issues, is a symptom of a deeper problem of a disconnected society. 

The issue of internet addiction, for instance, isn’t the internet itself, but rather the void it helps us fill.

In other words, addiction is escapism.

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Is texting culture giving us anxiety?

Texting culture has burdened us with the expectation to be reachable and responsive 24/7. What is such expectation costing us?

Although I didn’t feel entirely alone in suffering from texting induced anxiety, I didn’t think the problem was relevant enough to grant clinical terms, such as textiety and textaphrenia.

Text messaging is an essential part of communication, providing a quick and convenient method to stay connected with our family, friends, and acquaintances. But, despite being a useful mode of communication, the expectation to be reachable and responsive 24/7, literally, can be very stressful and overwhelming for many.

Textiety refers to the anxious feeling one gets from not receiving or sending text messages.

Mental health professionals are reporting anxiety around texting show up in their practice, and it is now part of a new area of research and treatment related to mobile devices and online communication.

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Online dating for those who hate online dating

A story about using the digital world as a tool to enrich our lives, not diminish it.

Naturally, I was against online dating for a very, very, very long time. Then, I joined Tinder, met my now-husband on the app, and the rest, as they say, is history.

Speaking of history…


A brief history of love & technology.

Online dating is almost as old as the Internet itself.

The first online dating website, kiss.com, was established in 1994. Only a year after the Internet went public. Match.com, a dating website many of you might be familiar with, has been around since 1995.

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